Monday, March 3, 2014

Relationship Killer!!




(image courtesy of pinterest.com)

With all these social media sites available to tweet on, post on, like, dislike, get in touch with lost friends, family, have interaction with people you have never met or haven't seen in years etc. is it killing relationships or enhancing them?  This may be the question of the age. One definition of a relationship per Merriam Webster is “the way in which two or more people, groups, countries, etc., talk to, behave toward, and deal with each other.” On social media that definition may still apply. We still connect to each other, more so on a regular basis than physically, as interaction and feedback is done so quickly. This is a good thing as people stay in touch. The problem with social media is that, if we are not careful, we can lose this intimacy we have in the physical world with people and over expose ourselves online, revealing everything about ourselves, our problems, successes, highs and lows. With social media sites there is a constant review of what we do. This can be commented on, liked or not liked, re-tweeted etc. It can be easy to see if one’s life is not as exciting as all your “friends” on line and it can become very stressful very quickly. Is it worth "keeping up with the Jones" so to speak. It is a balance I suppose and if handled carefully can be good for both your private life and your work life as well.

Social media in respect of social interaction is again a balancing act. It can break down barriers one may have in the real world as people feel freer to interact and any inhibitions are gone. But this can backfire as one doesn't develop skills to get over that in the real world. Face to face with people there is nowhere to hide. You cannot turn it off or disconnect from the reality of that situation. You have to deal with it.

The whole nature of our relationships with others, I feel changes with social media. One can become very close with people on line or feel you are. In the physical world this can be very different. What you are can be put out in cyberspace forever and I feel that we tend to give too much of ourselves online. With the click of a mouse one can find a relationship with a person over or damaged where the tone of what has been said is misinterpreted. This can happen quite easily. It may be looked upon as a good thing but one can interact again with people that fell out of our social circle. Old friends are brought back into this circle but this may be not for the good. I am a believer that people loose contact for a reason and that it is a natural thing to happen. Once makes new friends through one’s life and that reconnecting can somehow skew your natural balance regarding relationships. If one is in touch with a large group of people online this may affect the people you see on a day to day or regular basis in the physical world.

Even with all these connections online, all these people we are supposed to know are they really friendships. For example if you were to look at all the people you are friends with on Facebook I would doubt if you really knew half of them. They are friends of friends, casual acquaintances, people you know vaguely at work etc. We are polite on line, like or comment positively on what people say or do but is it really a true relationship? I align it to that same person you see every day on the train going to work You know he or she to say hello but that is about that.

As a society we need to be aware of the power of social media in our lives. Younger generations’ more than older ones are totally engaged in this and everything is filtered through these sites. For future generations one cannot imagine what will be available and the power it will bring. Social media can do a lot for relationships, socially and professionally. It can help people unite in common causes, become part of groups, connect with people personally and professionally. Once something is posted, depending on the site used, it is available worldwide for good or bad. Will relationships and one of the bases of society   be maintained on line going forward? Will physical human contact fall away or be reduced to a minimum and with what will be the implications as the question say for marriage and divorce, custodial rights, friendships, employment, and any number of other social issues? I guess we will have to wait and see. I am not too hopeful though given what I have seen and written about.


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